I’ll admit it, outfit requests annoy me. Especially when they are very specific, asking me to wear a particular style and colour of skirt, blouse, shoes and underwear. I remember one man telling – not asking, but telling – me to wear “a charcoal grey pencil skirt with a sheer white silk blouse, no bra, a black thong and sheer black nylons with a seam up the back and suspender belt.” I had a black skirt, a white polyester blouse and sheer black stockings without seams up the back but I didn’t even bother to tell him this – I just hung up the phone. And being asked what “uniforms” I have just makes my eye twitch. To me, “uniforms” are for school children and sailors. I have no interest in having sex in a cheesy Halloween costume, although it would be funny to dress up in an actual nurse’s outfit, complete with sensible orthopedic shoes and the little upside-down watch pinned to my pocket.
But I know that I am being somewhat unreasonable. It’s perfectly normal for a client to want to see something a bit special – be it just a desire for the lacy lingerie he’s not getting at home or a fetish for white cotton knickers. I have heard stories of escorts who put zero effort in, answering the door in jeans and a tee shirt or even a ratty old bathrobe. So I try to be understanding when a client asks me to wear something sexy. But if they think I’m working out of Edith Head’s store room, they are mistaken. As far as I’m concerned, there are several photos of me in various outfits in my advertisements and if they wanted to request one of those, fine. Expressing a preference for stockings, tights or bare legs is also fine (unless it’s the hottest day of the year and then I sabotage them by wearing my suspender belt over my knickers so it all has to come off. Hah!) I am even sometimes asked to wear “normal everyday casual clothes” and I like that – little do they know that I have a special “normal casual clothes” outfit for just this occasion because I’m pretty sure they’re not literally expecting me to greet them in my Napalm Death tee shirt.
Sometimes, a very specific request for an unusual item screams “Timewaster!” I was in Glasgow when a man texted and said, “I know this is a long shot, but do you have a pair of black Converse high-tops?” I replied, “I do!
I’m wearing them right now!” I sent him a photo of my feet to prove it and he made a booking… and never showed up. I don’t think he actually expected anyone to reply in the affirmative and just wanted to text a hooker about shoes or something.
Another tricky issue is when the request is something that I know will just look rubbish. “Could you wear an unbuttoned white blouse with no bra, a miniskirt, stockings, suspenders, knee-high boots and no makeup?” I could, but I’m sure not going to!
I learned early on to only display photographs of things I actually like to wear and so I purged all photos of myself in corsets long ago. I haven’t purged the corsets, yet, as I paid so much money for them but they’re buried deep in a drawer and unlikely to see the light of day, again.
As a touring escort, there is a limit to what I can take with me on the road. I usually bring the outfits in my recent photos and an assortment of lingerie and stockings and tights. I’m also usually limited to just a couple of pairs of shoes – one pair of black stilettos and one pair of ballet flats. I have red shoes and boots and all sorts but lack liveried footmen to carry my bags for me so they stay at home.
One touring limitation I really regret is that I don’t have the room for cross dressing lingerie. I don’t know why but I get a kick out of dressing burly men in pink lacy things. I wish I had a huge steamer trunk so that I could fill it with lots of plus-sized options and even shoes in the largest sizes. As it is, I try to stuff everything I think that I will need into my giant suitcase and hope that I can anticipate the desires of at least most of the men who want to book me.