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Discretion Works Both Ways

Discretion” is an important term in the world of escorting. Escorts frequently say that they are “discreet” or that they work from a “discreet” hotel or flat.

Discretion on the part of an escort means that they will protect their clients’ privacy.

But what specific things can an escort do to ensure that they are being discreet?

First and foremost, an escort should protect her client’s identity and not do anything that could “out” him.

Not digging around for information on his real name or employer, not posting anything identifying about him on social media, and saving phone numbers only under pseudonyms like “Lovely Guitar Guy Glasgow.” If a client is actually dangerous, then it is OK to out him to law enforcement. There are also warning services like National Ugly Mugs that will put their non-identifying information into a database and send alerts to subscribers to the service. But posting his phone number and name to Twitter because he no-showed isn’t really good at all. It just makes you look like a loon and puts potential genuine clients off.

It’s also indiscreet to contact a client out of the blue unless they have specifically requested that you do so

It’s just not cool to save every number and then send out texts announcing tours or trying to drum up business on a slow day. If I miss a phone call, I will send a text saying only “I’m sorry I missed your call” provided it has been no more than an hour since they called. If several hours have gone by, they may be in a meeting or with their families and it’s not a good idea to make their phones ping then.

I do have men asking me to please let them know when I am back in their town

I didn’t know how to keep track of them or make any sort of list for texting them so now what I do is direct them to my website where they can subscribe to my newsletter. That way I can let them know when I’m touring their area again. But if you don’t have a website, you can perhaps check out some of the apps available that allow you to compile various lists, with names like “London Tours” or “Text when in Birmingham” and then put their numbers into the appropriate list and use the app to send out announcements. Remember that you should ALWAYS have their permission to do so, first.

Working from a discreet location would mean someplace without a lot of nosy neighbours about, or anything that might make the client feel that he could be exposed

When I had an incall flat in Manchester, it was in a tall apartment block in the city centre, populated by young single professionals who tended to mind their own business. In a hotel, oddly enough, discreet means a very busy lobby where he can disappear into the crowd.

If you are going on an outcall or a dinner date, then you should think about how you look to the public

Unless the client specifically requests that you dress in outrageously slutty outfits, you should try to look like an ordinary person appropriate for the setting: feminine business clothes in a hotel, understated elegance in a restaurant. I actually wear sensible shoes to outcalls with a coat buttoned over my sexy outfit and then change into heels in the lift up to the hotel room.

Clients should also try to be discreet

While you may only be visiting an escort for one hour, she has to worry about her privacy all the time. If you are visiting her for an incall, be mindful of blending in quietly. I have been alarmed on a couple of occasions when working from hotels. On one, the client arrived at my upscale Central London hotel dressed in his work clothes as he’d come straight from his job working as a welder. He was an absolutely lovely guy, but I still worried because he didn’t dress like a guest at the hotel. Luckily, reception was so incredibly busy that night that I don’t think anyone noticed him but if they had it could have lead to them being curious about what he was doing there and where he was going. On a more recent occasion, a client told me that he was at the hotel but had to go to the cash machine, first. When he arrived in my room, he told me that he’d asked reception where to find a cash machine, then went to the petrol station across the road, then came back past reception to go to the lifts. He’d ignored my directions to enter through the back door and bypass reception entirely and he’d also ignored my request to call him from outside the building – he’d called me from the lobby, right in front of the receptionist. Please don’t be that guy!

Visiting an escort at her home or incall flat requires similar discretion

Don’t call her right outside her door, talking loudly about your “booking.” Don’t loiter around the front door if you show up early. Hang back and be discreet until you are ready to come in the building.

And never, ever drop by an escort’s premises without an appointment!

I have heard many stories of escorts who work from their homes getting knocks on their doors when they’re relaxing with friends and family. There stands some fellow they saw three months ago, wanting to know if she had any availability just then. Even if it’s a flat she rents specifically for work, and not her home, don’t come by and knock or buzz… how would you like it if your booking were interrupted by someone dropping by?

If you recognise an escort out in public – either from her photographs or having visited her before – leave her alone

I have seen clients in places like pubs and shops on occasion and if we make eye contact, the most I will do is give a very small smile and look away. If he’s with anyone else, I will look right through him as if I don’t recognise him and turn away. Never approach an escort and speak to her in public. If you want to talk to her, call the number in her advertising and make a booking. Twice I have had men walk up to me in public and ask “Are you Kim?” The first time I just brushed by and said, “Sorry! No autographs!” (I thought that was sort of funny.) The second time it happened the man just walked up and started talking. He fell into step with me and asked if I were available for a booking right then. Well, no – obviously I wasn’t. I was out shopping. If he’d wanted an appointment then he could have called me on the telephone and made a booking! I was alone on both occasions but I have known escorts to be followed, stared at, and even spoken to when they were out with their families.

There’s nothing shameful about being an escort or seeing one, but there are many good reasons to respect one another’s privacy and personal space. Neither escort or client should do anything to breach confidentiality and cause potential distress to them or their loved ones.

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